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Split Personality. |
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18 May 2011
I'm so tired.I'm so tired with myself, so tired with the cruel world, so tired with everything. Yet, what choice do i have? Yes, walk straight. Don't ever stop. I won't, but i'm just so tired. I don't want to stop, i will not stop, but will anything stop me? Today's a lousy day...and what about tomorrow? Another rotten day? Can't imagine what's out there for me, i'm vulnerable to anything, yet i seem to be emotionless. Maybe i should find some way out. So what? Is anyone going to save me? I'm just drowning...and drowning even further. I can't stop sinking, but i seem to be able to grab on somehow. I stay semi afloat. What the shit, i'd rather sink and just die. Sometimes, the water seems harmless after all; it dosen't seem to be choking me...because i'm the one who is struggling and choking myself. 16 May 2011
AHHHA i swear the minions are the cutest things ever. :D School was shit today, expecting more than shit on Wednesday. Hopefully things would get better. I'll never just read through the Physics File to study for an exam again...look at my MCQ grades. Pwesh. We should have an orientation camp after exam! (: Alright, tomorrow will always be a better day, so keep smiling! [: The Forgotten.
     Sometimes i wonder why i even care. But at the end, there isn't any reason i can come up with. Maybe what hurts most is because i still care. But before you go, please do remember that i haven't forget the stupid things we did, the words you always say. I remember them, clearly, and i'll never forget. Yes, you aren't the cleverest person on Earth and you can blood-demanding sometimes, but please do know that you're still my friend after all, and i will still be there for you no matter what. Don't forget, but if you do, i've no choice. Alas, goodbye, since that's what you want, and you're happy that way. 14 May 2011
 This tells us that....we have to be happy no matter what. (: So i'm happy! :D Hahaha. Because i had lunch with the three other noobs after staying back for chinese yesterday...Fish and Co! :D One noob ordered baked rice. The rest of us ordered fish and chips. Our fish and chips came after 20 min with love. :D That noob's baked rice didn't come for one hour...the chef missed out her order. Had complimentary chips. The other noob say wanna wait for the noob's baked rice to come, but in the end cannot tahan, so she eat first. -.- The entire lunch ended with waiting for 10min for our change...and complaining about paying the service fare. There's one noob that says she wanna complain (cause she don't want to pay the service fee which costs around $1++) but I told her give people chance. People wanna work right? :D Too bad i got scolded by the two other noobs for saying that. Went to buy KOI with the change cause we didn't know how to split the change. -.- Some passionfruit and aloe vera flavour. (: Four people share one medium cup...epic. But it was nice. (: Said goodbye...but we're going to the library to do Chinese one day later. TEEHEE :D 12 May 2011
  I took so many things for granted. And i didn't realise that, i'm just stupid. To not see what's bad for you is okay, but to not see who cares for you is stupid. I haven't say sorry...because i don't know how to. AND YET, i'm still doing it today; taking things for granted. When am i ever going to stop? I'm just a stupid fool who studies so well but knows nothing about the world. I know how it feels like, being taken for granted. It's like you want to do your very best, and you did. And people's hopes get higher, you realise it, but you still want to do your best because you care. But do the person cares? Maybe. Or maybe No? It's like climbing up a ladder...you anticipate more and more from helping. But you get lesser and lesser things back, and finally, when you reach the peak, there ain't any support. You just collapse without a sound; nobody knows. And you can never stand up again. 11 May 2011
 OMMMGGG!!! I feel dead already. Luckily MYE's gonna end....or i think i'll just die. I'm struggling with Organic Chemistry right now...am regretting for not listening much in class. ): Had subway for lunch and ate that meatball sandwich. Threw my own face away at the counter. Didn't know what to answer the person. DAMN and yet marine and ana still can laugh at me. -.- TWO MORE PAPERS!!! 08 May 2011
 Don't forget who you are. It's as if i just woke up and realised that "WHOA, everything's different." Why? And i won't get any answer. But please, you know it yourself too. Stop it. Have you forgotten who are the ones who is always there for you, and who really care? If you want build yourself to what you want to be right now, please remember to at least show gratitude. We don't deserve to be treated like that, you know. TODAY IS A BAD DAY. And so was Friday and Saturday. Because i stayed at home and plough through my Phyics file and the chemistry TYS. It was stupid. But...what to do? Work towards your goals mah. :D PAP has won the elections for Radin Mas SMC. :D Well done! I mean, yeah, Mr Tan deserves the vote because he made an effort to upgrade the old estate i'm living in now. Even though i still have places i'm really buay song about. Like: #1 Blk 42 is stained with algae for _____ years and nothing happens. #2 The lift has cardboards decorating it. And it's peeling off. The beep has spoilt. But its these little things that make me feel home. (: I can still remember the white shirt that has laid untouched on the roof of the walkway for a few years. I can still remember the orange lights from the bus stop all the way to my void deck. Anyway, congrats! :D WHOA WHOA WHOA. :D Totally an eye-opener. I must learn to love 'O'Levels chemistry paper. HAHA :D The Chemistry Olympiad was almost disaster. First question don't know how to do already. Maybe i only know how to do 10 out of 50 questions hahaha. And it's so damn cold over there. Cold until i shiver and can't hold pen and press calculator properly. Ahahaha screwed. The guy sitting beside me from XX school gave up halfway. I saw him looking into blank space. Then i'm like a noob; never stop checking till last minute. OH yes, Raffles JC is damn huge. Can get lost inside. O: Whatever...over liao. And now it's exams. |